Next Gen iphone Homescreen revealed
(Note: The following post is purely satirical and captures my frustration about the inconsistencies of Apple’s approval processes. Things are slowly changing for the good 
Rumor has it that the next generation of the popular iphone will see a severe reduction of pre-installed apps. The new Homescreen will basically only be populated with two standard icons, Weather and Settings.
All other apps failed the appstore approval process this time, as examples:
- Text: Text messages cost extra, however an app can not create revenue outside of itunes
- Calendar: The reviewer was successfully creating a test appointment using objectionable words
- Photos: The reviewer was able to successfully load pictures of non-dressed humans
- Camera: The reviewer was able to successfully take a picture of a broken glass which when viewed with great imagination appears as if the iphone screen is broken which might confuse users
- Youtube: Obvious
- Stocks: The Apple stock going down might be confusing for customers
- Maps: Searching for the “F***” word shows results in almost any city (it’s true! try it)
- Safari: Very obvious
- Mail: After 10 seconds reading spam the decision was easy
- Phone: The reviewer was able to successfully call an escort service.
- Generally the homescreen of the new iphone is too similar to the old iphone which might confuse customers
According to insider sources, Apple is trying hard to get more of their pre-installed apps approved. However, all they get from the review team is a standardized email answer so they don’t know what to change. They now try to get at least the “phone” app in by constantly resubmitting it, hoping for a new reviewer that does not yet understand how the approval process works.
Which really means: Any of them.
